Adulting: ★★★★☆

It's not that bad. Just challenging... and expensive.

A lot of kids can't wait to grow up because it seems so simple that adults can do whatever they want and there are just no rules to follow. As an adult, and you probably are too, you would know that's a lie. Adulting is quite the struggle - there's actually a lot of rules that apply (e.g. laws) of what you can and cannot do, and what you should do or else you get in trouble, like filing your taxes.

I personally enjoy my adulthood. There's a lot of challenges, but I know we'll get through it so I never really think of it as an issue. I mean, they are, but I try not to let it bring me down. I know people handle problems different and I typically prefer not to tell people who aren't involved. Probably another reason why some folks would think I have the perfect life, and some people assume that I'm rich and swimming in thousands of dollars if not more - because life is good.

Now here's the truth.

First - I learned to express myself.

Growing up in the Philippines in the late 80's up to the early 2000's definitely gave me great memories. It also gave me a lot of challenges - I was scolded and often criticized because apparently, I was too blunt and too honest, I had colorful hair, painted nails, I wore bright colors and short skirts.... I wasn't the ideal young girl back then. I often choose not to talk about sad and bitter things, but it's part of my life that I can't really deny happening.

I was told to get over my depression and that it was just a phase, and that my breakdowns were overreactions and that I should apologize for such actions. I had teachers in high school who straight up told me that I will be a teen mother and ruin my life before I turn 20. People told me that I wasn't going to succeed.

So I stopped caring. I did what I wanted to do especially when I landed my first job after finishing college (which involved balancing parties and studying). As I got older, there were more expectations - you can't be childish anymore, can't be emotional, can't do this, can't do that, act like this and act like that.
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I will never get rid of my stuff toys. Enjoy some of my collection.

Too bad, I will adult how I see fit. I color my hair, paint my nails, collect stuff toys, collect Hello Kitty and unicorns, and I pay bills. I realized that no matter what people say, they really don't affect how I function in my daily life. They don't feed me, they don't take care of me if anything goes wrong, therefore, their input doesn't matter.

Second - with adulting comes responsibilities.

The not-so-fun part. As I let go and remove the people who only bring me misery, because I choose to rid of toxicity in my life, unfortunately I can't get rid of bills. Understandably so, especially that we had some some credit debt we are still paying off.

Homeownership is a double-edged sword. I grew up having our own home, but homeownership back in the Philippines is way too different than it is here in the USA. First off, the taxes are insanely high and there's also more maintenance that needs to be done. I don't really regret owning our home now tho, especially that the rent had gone up significantly in the past few years. I think we bought our home in the perfect time. I love our old, cozy home.

Last year, our water heater broke. Unfortunately, water heaters in Wisconsin isn't really a luxury - it's a necessity you really can't live without. It's not a big deal during the warmer months but come winter, you need hot water to keep your home's pipes running and prevent bursting. Now some homes are very nicely heated and insulated, but I'm not sure with ours - and if I keep running cold water down the drain in winter, it's a guaranteed pipe burst. 

Then our AC broke. Not much of a big deal but our AC is connected to our furnace since it's central air. So it still had to be fixed. Last week, the actual furnace broke. It's an older furnace but it's supposed to last you 30-40 years. I guess it'll never see it's intended retirement.

These are just little things that cost in owning a home on top of utilities, groceries, insurance, and other bills that have to be paid. It's pretty easy for people with a lot of savings or really large salaries to just pay for things, but it's a quite challenging to replace several thousands of dollars that you didn't really plan for and have not enough saved, if any.

sigh

Life must go on.

​While it's really a challenge, and I'm not sugar coating this at all - it really is, my Bear and I know that life must go on. We'll get things figured out and forward we go! 
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Me and my overly dramatic self.